Leadership by 16Personalities

Leadership by 16Personalities

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Leadership by 16Personalities
Leadership by 16Personalities
How to Sort What’s Yours to Carry: Release What’s Beyond Your Control

How to Sort What’s Yours to Carry: Release What’s Beyond Your Control

Learn to Distinguish Between Your “Circle of Concern” and Your “Circle of Influence”

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Carly from 16Personalities
Jun 05, 2025
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Leadership by 16Personalities
Leadership by 16Personalities
How to Sort What’s Yours to Carry: Release What’s Beyond Your Control
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A weary musician – an exhausted man sits at his cluttered piano surrounded by crumpled papers and musical instruments. Text reads: "Managing Stress Challenge: Day 4"
Image from 16personalities.com

TLDR:

  • Stress multiplies when we focus energy on things beyond our control

  • Most leaders waste significant mental resources trying to control the uncontrollable

  • Sorting challenges into “influence” vs. “concern” zones creates immediate relief

  • Action-oriented focus on your sphere of influence produces better results with less stress

  • The ability to release what’s beyond your control is a hallmark of resilient leadership

Welcome to Day 4

Hello and welcome to day four of our Managing Stress Challenge! Today, we’re focusing on a powerful stress management technique: distinguishing between what you can and cannot control. This simple practice can reduce your stress levels while increasing your effectiveness.

Let’s get right into it, shall we?

To recap quickly, here’s where you currently stand in the Managing Stress Challenge:

  • Day 1: Notice Your Stress Signals

  • Day 2: Acknowledge Your Default Coping Mechanisms

  • Day 3: Notice the Stories You Tell Yourself

  • Day 4: Clarify What’s in Your Control (You Are Here)

  • Day 5: Notice How You Recover (or Don’t)

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Your Two Spheres: Influence vs. Concern

Consider how much mental and emotional energy you’ve spent recently worrying about things you cannot change: AI disrupting your industry, economic uncertainty, talent shortages, changing customer expectations, geopolitical events affecting supply chains, or regulatory shifts.

Even internally, you might stress over executive decisions outside your authority, other departments’ timelines, or past mistakes that can’t be undone. But this misdirected focus actively prevents you from exercising influence where you actually have it.

Management thinker Stephen Covey popularized a simple but powerful framework: distinguishing between your “circle of concern” and your “circle of influence.”

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